Thursday, October 11, 2007

"You're gonna have to go through hell, worse than any nightmare you've ever dreamed"

This Saturday night (Moscow Time) sees America's own faded former champ Evander Holyfield travel deep into enemy territory to take on Sultan Ibragimov - the WBO Heavyweight champ. If Holyfield wins it'll make him an amazing five-times heavyweight champ and get a slice of the heavyweight cake back on the USA plate. But more importantly, this is just like Rocky and Ivan Drago all over again.

Rocky was past his best and the universal underdog. Evander is 44 and has taken some beatings of late. Ibragimov is an unbeaten heavyweight built by evil scientists in a lab, just like Drago. Rocky and Evander are blue collar heroes. Sultan and Ivan are both just robots incapable of uttering only short phrases such as "You will lose," or "If he dies, he dies," or "I must break you".

OK, Evander is black and Sultan does not have a blonde flat-top, but everything else is identical. Evander will turn the crowd around and have them chanting his name at the end. Sultan will angrily proclaim his selfishness and incur the wrath of Vladimir Putin. But most importantly of all, Evander apparently has a real ROBOT in his house that glides around serving drinks and playing tinny 80s music.

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